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Location: Sheffield, South Yorkshire, United Kingdom

Sunday, September 24, 2006

start of week 4

It's Sunday night and I've spent at least five and a half hours of today planning. Planning four lessons! Ha ha. I'm waiting for the day when it takes just ten minutes per lesson.

I've been feeling quite positive today~ I don't know, I think teaching Japanese at the college on Friday really lifted my spirits and reminded me of the reasons why I decided to do this job. They were just excellent. They did what they were supposed to do, they laughed and had a good time. They left the room being able to do their self-introduction in Japanese. This is what I want! People who learn and want to learn and don't think I'm a pile of you-know-what.

The start of the week is always hell. Monday to Wednesday is pretty manic. So I'm dreading tomorrow even though it's Sunday and officially the weekend and so dread-free. Supposedly.

We're told to prioritise and do only the things that really need doing. But in my eyes I'm only doing what is necessary. Without doing what I'm doing my lessons would be more of a shambles and I wouldn't be fulfilling my job description.

I'm hanging in there. I'm trying to see the positives because I've committed myself and I'm not the kind to let people down. I just feel kind of solitary at the moment. School, home, my desk. Weekends to look forward to but that always end too quickly. I like spontaneity and randomness but it's impossible these days. Oh I shouldn't complain. There must be a million people who'd want to be in my position. Perhaps I'm too selfish and used to having everything I want that I am unable to come to grips with this new lifestyle. I resent it but I know I shouldn't. I should be embracing every minute and giving myself completely to these kids. I'm trying to and sometimes I do but I don't know if I can forever. I can only think of tomorrow right now.

1 Comments:

Anonymous 1u said...

wonderful!

8:26 AM  

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